Hah!  I thought so!  Why are you pro-life?

Why not?  For 35 years... (Satan stops abruptly.)  Did you hear that?  Thirty-five, count ‘em, thirty-five years.  For thirty-five years the pro-life movement has claimed to be opposed to legalized abortion in the USA .  Yet today I have complete access to any fetus I want.  No power anywhere in this nation prevents people from killing babies and consigning their dead bodies to my care up until the moment their head or toe emerges from the mother's vagina.  It is a matter of unimpeachable fact that I owe my access to the bodies of aborted babies to the pro-life movement.  Without the pro-life movement there is no telling what might have happened to legalized abortion.  It was the pro-life movement that made my continuing access to aborted human cadavers a guaranteed certainty.

(Begins to rant.)  You think that will do any good?  You're still alone.  You have no power!  Nobody will support you.  NOBODY! Everybody knows who you are!  All good pro-lifers like myself hate you for exactly the same reason.  You are a trouble maker exactly like Paul Hill.  Instead of getting people to kill abortionists, you tried to frighten abortionists by your Nuremberg Files list where you exposed them to the fear that somebody would come and kill them.  If the pro-life movement hadn't stepped up and worked with Planned Parenthood to get your list shut down, you might have been able to do what Paul Hill tried to do and do it legally without any abortionist being killed.  That was the most evil idea imaginable!  Then on top of that you started that AbortionCams thing where you put up thousands of pictures of people going to kill their babies.  If the other pro-lifers like Alan Keyes had not    helped me stop you and your "abortion abolitionist" friends, there is no telling what kind of deterrence you might have created.  But me and my fellow pro-lifers stopped you because we know it is insane to do things that get millions of people mad at you.  Face it, every pro-lifer knows you are insane, insane exactly like Paul Hill and the others like him.  You think stopping legalized abortion is more important than your own stupid meaningless life.  Here you have been given the easiest, most luxurious, most protected lifestyle in the recorded history of my world and you are willing to risk destroying it all just to stop people from legally killing unborn babies.  You are patently insane.  You are the embodiment of evil!  And every pro-lifer on the planet is right to hate you just exactly like I hate you.  (Pauses with an evil look against which all other evil looks is measured.)  I'll tell you one thing.  All us pro-lifers know about your (sarcastic) The Creator's Rights party.  The Creator has no rights!  I am the god of this world!  The Creator gave me authority over this world!  All us pro-lifers know that there is nothing more important than protecting our own personal peace and prosperity. Anybody who thinks differently is insane.  Did you hear me INSANE!  They should be institutionalized immediately!  Immediately!  For their own good.